Imperfect Steps

Lately I’ve been planning a wedding, and to be honest, it’s been a bit nerve wracking. That’s taken me by surprise since I’ve planned book release parties and art shows a number of times and have felt little to no anxiety over them. I realized that the difference is that I’ve always thought of those events as “mine.” So, if I made a big mistake—forgot something crucial—I could still laugh it off because it was my party, my show, my event. But this time, it’s different. The idea of forgetting something important is significantly more stressful because I’ve been thinking of this event as “theirs.” I’ve imagined forgetting the forks and napkins for the wedding reception and everyone eating cake with their fingers covered in icing. If it were my event, I’d laugh and tell the photographer to get lots of pictures. But, will my daughter and her husband-to-be find it funny on such a special and holy occasion if everyone’s fingers are sticky? 

So, I’ve been waking up early or going to bed late, making lists, making arrangements, sending emails. Trying to make sure I don’t forget something important.

A few days ago I went for a run in freezing temperatures. I wore the biggest, most colorful scarf you’ve ever seen (as a guess), a hat, two jackets and fingerless mittens (I was very sorry I didn’t have the fingered kind!) As I ran, I thought of the verse that our pastor mentioned in his sermon the Sunday before last. “‘Come, follow Me,’ Jesus said, ‘And I will make you fishers of men.’” ~Matthew 4:19 

The words, “I will make you,” ran through my mind. 

The certainty of them…

The Bible says that “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” ~Philippians 1:6. Whatever God starts, He continues. What He continues, He completes. He never forgets anything. 

So as I ran in the freezing cold, I whispered these words over and over again: He has made, He is making, He will make. He has drawn, He is drawing, He will draw. He has saved, He is saving, He will save. 

These words lifted the paralysis that had come from feeling overwhelmed, scared that I don’t have what it takes. God made me. He continues to make me. He will not stop making me until all is finished. I can take the next imperfect step, paint the next imperfect picture, make the next imperfect, big or little decision because God is trustworthy with all my imperfect steps and because He is always making something more than what I am making. He is always at work, beyond what I am working at.

My life belongs to the Lord. And my events belong to the Lord. They were never just mine. They were always His. And my daughter’s wedding day? Also His. With that in mind, I can still afford to laugh if I forget the forks and napkins for the wedding reception. (Though I’ll do it quietly on such a special and holy occasion).

Blessings to you today as you take imperfect steps.

~Amy