His Banner Over Me

Not long ago I was painting a picture of a girl sitting under a tree with the moon dramatically large on the horizon and lanterns hanging above her. I titled it, “His Banner Over Me.” It’s about God’s love that is the ground beneath us, the shelter over us and the hope that lifts our eyes upward. I could feel the meaning of it and the mood I was reaching for. I began by painting a deep, brilliant blue sky and a golden tree. It was already beginning to have the glow I was after. But then…I realized colors wouldn’t work—not once I added the lanterns. The lanterns were going to be red. They had to be red, and they would fight with the bold colors I’d used so far. But that meant I’d have to change everything. All that was working, was working toward the wrong outcome. If I’d kept going it would have been okay, but I hadn’t been picturing an okay painting. I’d been picturing a glorious painting.

It’s hard to paint over a picture that looks good—much harder than painting over one that looks terrible. It’s like closing your eyes tight and jumping off the high dive. Or maybe more like taking off a bandaid. You’ve got to do it quickly or you won’t do it at all. It’s the kind of thing that would make an onlooker gasp.

I sat there staring at my beautiful painting that was ultimately headed in the wrong direction, and I felt the heat rise in my face. Then I took the plunge. I slapped paint right on top of it—none of the color could be salvaged except as an underpainting. It was scary. I doubted myself thoroughly. But then I remembered these words that I’ve said so many times before in similar situations: “It’s going to be even better.” I said them out loud and my confidence began to return. This isn’t the first time I’ve shared a story like this with you. I have loads of them and I’ll share more in the future because these things happen all the time.

I find again and again that the lessons I learn in art filter down into life. Just yesterday I learned I’d accidentally done harm in a relationship with the very actions I’d intended for good. That happens. Maybe you’ve experienced it too? And this morning as I felt the weight of yesterday’s failures and missteps and the uncertainty of my next steps, I prayed for God’s help. And I thought to myself, “It’s going to be even better.” And courage stirred and I lifted my head. It really is always going to be even better because God… 

Because He came. Because He walks with me. Because He doesn’t leave me on my own. Because He cares. Because He listens. Because He’s such a very good friend. 

That’s it. Just because God. 

Blessings to you today, even when you’re faced with your failures. It’s going to be even better because His banner over you and me, is love.

~Amy