A Lesson in Lying

When I was in second grade our school introduced a new machine to help monitor the noise level in the lunchroom. It looked just like a traffic light. When the light turned from green to yellow, it was a warning that everyone needed to quiet down, and when it turned red (as it often did) it meant we had to endure “Silent Lunch.” 

Silent Lunch never bothered me because I always brought a book with me to read. That’s the kind of kid I was. To give you a better picture, imagine a dreamy eight year old who loves unicorns and reads the chronicles of Narnia obsessively. A kid who is mostly an observer at school, only talking to close friends but talking a ton at home. A kid who is hoping to someday find a door that leads to another world and spends most of recess looking for or pretending to have found that door. That was me. 

It took me completely by surprise one day when I was called up to the teacher’s table during Silent Lunch, along with my friend Sydney (a girl who had fantastic red hair). I was even more surprised when Mrs. Fig, a teacher I didn’t know at all said to us, “Why were you girls talking during silent lunch?” “We weren’t,” we answered together. Mrs. Fig frowned at us. “You both are going to go to the principal’s office because you disobeyed the rules of Silent Lunch AND you lied about it.”

Neither Sydney nor I had ever been to the principal’s office but we’d heard stories. The rumor was that Mr. Strickland had an electric paddle that he disciplined disobedient kids with. As an adult I think back on that rumor and realize it could not have been true, but my eight year old self thought it was entirely likely. That’s what I was thinking about as  Sydney and I walked into Mr. Strickland’s office that day. 

“I understand that you girls were talking during Silent Lunch,” said Mr. Strickland looking down at us with a serious but not unkind expression. Sydney and I quickly said that we hadn’t talked at all. “I was reading my book,” I explained further. “Mrs. Fig said she saw you two talking. Are you calling Mrs. Fig a liar?” Sydney and I didn’t know what to say to this. We knew we hadn’t talked. “Girls, you have a choice. You can either admit that you talked in Silent Lunch or… there will have to be consequences.”

After a long pause I spoke up. “I’m sorry we talked.” Sydney looked at me in surprise. “But we didn’t!” she said in a loud whisper. “Yes we did,” I whispered back raising my eyebrows and widening my eyes. Slowly Sydney conceded. “I’m sorry we talked during Silent Lunch,” Sydney said looking angry.  

So here’s a recap: two kids who didn’t talk during Silent Lunch got in trouble for talking and then after telling the truth they got in trouble for lying. They were sent to the principal’s office for both of these offenses and then found that the only way to keep from getting paddled (with an electric paddle) was to lie to the principal. And once they lied, all was forgiven and they went back to class. Isn’t that interesting? And kind of sad… But let’s just enjoy the irony. I do love irony. 

~Amy

Amy GrimesComment