Thoughts On Worth, God, Vincent van Gogh, and Donald Trump

Lately I've been thinking about worth—maybe it's because of Donald Trump. I keep seeing pictures of him with that, "I'm an extraordinarily valuable person" look on his face. I've been considering how easy it is for people to think of themselves as products. It's not just because of Donald Trump that I've been considering these things. It's also because my husband and I have been working on a book together. A product. And I wonder—how will that go? Will it be a success? What if it's not?

Other people's opinions of me or my book are not my source. Success is not my source.

I've been reading a book called, The Artist's Way. In it, the author talks about the concept of "God as my source." The way I'd explain that concept is like this: The book I've written and illustrated is not my source. Other people's opinions of me or my book are not my source. Success is not my source. Instead, I'm recognizing God as my source—my source of creativity, hope, joy...everything I need. This idea has been helping me a lot. With God as my source, my fears fall away. Somehow this feels closely connected with the idea that results do not determine my worth. My worth is determined by God. I've found rest in that.

I bet Vincent van Gogh was a high/low guy—hence the "ear incident".

I'm an up and down person. I can either be up and down like rolling hills, or like a crazy roller coaster. Remembering that God is my source of worth, and everything else I need, takes the highest peaks and deepest valleys down to a level that's not destructive. I bet Vincent van Gogh was a high/low guy—hence the "ear incident". Seems like he was the stereotypical artist who feels everything. I'm one of those too.  But I bet that if the stereotypical artist knew his worth didn't go up and down with his emotions—his life might have gone better. Vincent might have kept his ear. 

People aren't products. They're beings, personalities, creations of extraordinary worth. If Donald really knew what made him valuable he'd act different. He'd treat women better. And, I think he'd wipe that look off his face.

- Amy